Headache

Why do I get so into things. Another diner, with another bunch of people talking about a bunch of stuff that really doesn't matter. I mean what is the point of having a bunch of twenty-something gather and talk about "issues" anyway. Are we so self-righteous that we actually think that our opinions matter that much. Oh woo woo, here we are in our fabulous friends fabulous condo on the ever trendy Montreal's "Plateau" neighborhood talking about shit. What is up with that? Who cares? Who fucking cares? Why do we insist on sitting there, boring the crap out of each other, trying to use conversation and good table manners as a way of proving to each other who is superior and more intelligent. Yeah yeah, I think Weber pales in comparison to Puccini, but WHO FUCKING CARES. If I have to hear one more time what some fuck thinks about opera I am going to start lose my marbles.

Well, I guess I am no better. I keep going to these diners and parties and brunches and join in the pretentiousness. Oh you bought a condo, welcome to the club, I guess you are one of us now. What the fuck is that supposed to mean? So I can hang out with you now because I will be living I a luxury condo? Christ, what is this world coming too. Oh blah blah blah the Passion of the Christ was such a wonderful comment on the history *yawn*. Are we insane? Do we actually believe that any of this matters?

What is important anyway? Is it important to discuss these things? What does it accomplish. NOTHING. It fills the void that would have been present had we not all been at diner talking about these things. But then again, had we not been there, what would have been doing? Personally, I would have been reading, or working or trying to learn something new or even spend some quality time with JR.

I guess I value my time much more now that I am approaching the big Three Oh. Is this really an appropriate way to spend my time? Or am I just bitter and jaded... Bitter at 30. Man oh man, I hate to see how fucked up I will be in 50 years... If the planet ever makes it that far... But that's a whole other rant for different day perhaps.

and can I say... I am really fucking fed up with racism.

G