Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Pee Shy

Last night, I watched a very interesting episode of Degrassi, The Next Generation. This is, of course, a Canadian show, which addresses issues faced by everyday teenagers and Canadian youth. This latest episode pitted a wheelchair bound guy and his girlfriend against the grim reality that he would never have an erection. Of course, in true TV style, they determined that they could overcome this *ahem* shortcoming, by finding other ways to have sex.

This got me thinking long and hard about sex and what constitutes sex. Obviously, if there is some kind of penetration, vaginal, anal, oral, it is sex. But what if one of the two partners cannot achieve orgasm? Like in the case of our paraplegic friend: is he actually having sex? Or what if he cannot penetrate his partner? I suppose he could do lots of things to her/him but what about the reverse? Would he still be considered a virgin?

What if you don't actually touch someone else, but you achieve orgasm in the vicinity of others? Is that sex? This is a question that has been on my mind a lot recently. I keep running into someone I know, a dear friend of mine actually. The trouble is, I run into him in the most compromising situation! I have caught this person whacking off at urinals on 4 different occasions. Two occasions I managed to leave without him seeing me, and two others, we were forced into very unpleasant conversation while I was washing my hands trying desperately to erase the picture from my mind.

I will not go into a tirade about public sex right now. Some people are into it, that's their business. Whacking off at a urinal at the mall... It is a whole new level of perversion.

This got me thinking some more. What if this person had a partner? Would he be cheating on his spouse by jerking off with a bunch of people of at a urinal? (There were 4 of them going at it. An eye opening experience, to say the least!) There was no actually physical contact. So is it any different than watching porn or downloading some hot pics online? Or going to a nudie bar? But the line has to be drawn somewhere right?

So I asked my friend Charles (Not the guy at the urinal) if he would want to know if his partner was whacking off at urinals. And like me, he did not really know. He couldn't determine if that consisted cheating or not. I understand his indecision, but, the line needs to be drawn somewhere.

Now I want to address this whole, whacking off in public thing. I feel I have lived a relatively innocent life. But about 2 years ago, a friend of mine told me about a website: Cruising for sex dot com. This site is one of many that provides lists upon lists of areas to play in public, such as the situation I described above. I had no idea this was such a popular activity. Well, curiosity got the best of me, and I have to say, I checked out some known spots in Montreal, to see if this was true. And oh my gosh!

Montreal is full of perverts. Pick any men's washroom in this city, and if you sit around long enough, some pervert will walk in looking for action. Really, it's insane. This also explains why there are so many security cameras and security guards constantly flowing in out of public washrooms.

The moral of the story, is beware of the guy standing next to you at the urinals. If you think he's been standing there too long, odds are he's not peeing.


Mathua said...

Boys and their toy! Other questions you should ask : is anonymous sex with other men via the web (cam) considered cheating if you have a partner? Is secretly meeting other men (without having sex?) considered cheating if you have a partner?

BTW innocent and gay man is an oxymoron!

Cheers :)

MarkMtl said...

In my opinion live/cam is cheating because the potential for interaction via touching or talking between you and the participants is possible and likely, whereas with a porn video it's solely one way.

Happy Holidays.